“You is kind. You is smart. And you is important.”
One of my favorite cinematic/literary lines ever.
We weren’t all raised with a wise, kind nanny with whom we could feel unconditional love. Hopefully our parents or other adult figures provided that. But perhaps not.
What messages were you raised with that you’ve come to believe about yourself? You are important and loved? Or…you are unworthy and won’t amount to anything?
Consider this: As an adult, it is vital to your self-esteem to sort through those messages and question them, with ferocious honesty and clarity. Some will be accurate. But some will not apply to you at all!
Sorting through them is a process I call “re-parenting”. If they don’t fit, if they’re not true and accurate, they don’t belong to you, and certainly don’t belong in your head. Philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti puts it like this: “You have to be your own teacher.”
And sometimes, your own parent.