Allow ol’ Alex to briefly explain: It takes around 100 milliamps to stop a human heart. This device channeled somewhere between 13,000 and 33,000 volts, hence bypassing such pedestrian symptoms as muscular contractions and going straight for cardiac arrest and heat transference that was of such a magnitude his skin likely caught his clothing on fire (instead of the reverse, which is my normal experience in such). It was incredible to witness, even as firefighters finally cut through the fence to get to him. He survived a phenomenal six hours in this condition. What a fine death.
My time and column length are short, but know this: Do not mistake my mindset for cruelty. I am incapable of such, a human robot with shit for a soul, as cops are viewed. I just appreciate what happened as being a pure statistical anomaly. And as it further happens, I deal with statistical anomalies by “getting really excited and chatty about it.” See? Don’t try to get me fired over this bit, too.
After it was all over, I eased back to my district, obsessing over Mr. Crisp’s last-minute journey at the speed of light, and in truth haven’t really stopped doing so since then. But I have to admit: Hixson just racked up some “Cool Points” in my book.
See? I’m capable of changing my mind, “shocking” as it may be. What a night.