For legal reasons I won’t go too far into sleep aids, but there too we are experts. Diphenhydramine, melatonin: worthless. Hangover-inducing pills that actually deny you any good REM sleep, just making you feel like a different kind of shit instead of the “regular” feeling of shit that goes with sleep deprivation…and you can’t drink yourself to sleep every morning because not only is that absolutely cost-prohibitive, what does drinking result in? A constant need to pee. Imagine, finally achieving sweet, sweet sleep, and having your bladder start knocking on your brain like it owes it money. Ugh.
(For the record: The maker or makers of Ambien need to be given a Nobel Prize.)
Sleep. Completely wasted on the young, and so easily taken for granted. There are few things more cruel that don’t involve spiders than sleep deprivation, so if you know of someone working Zombieland, please…fire off a little prayer for their psyche, and if you are in their company and you see a cat-like third eyelid slip over their cornea and that polite smile emits an occasional snore—just let it go.
In fact… goodnight, folks.