Alex Teach

"Whoever went to the trouble of seizing this $200 dollar piece of the name of the Great State of Tennessee will always have my respect, and I hope to this day it was crushed somewhere with dignity.” more

Aug 7, 2014 12:00 AM On The Beat

“Safe Injection Sites.” I can remember the first time I heard of this phenomena…partly because it was too shocking to the conscious to conceive as real and partly because the concept of being “shocked” is clearly coming to an end in this world ... more

Jan 17, 2018 11:51 AM On The Beat

“Accountability.” As anyone with a pulse in America knows, this country is all about accountability—especially when it comes to its Police Officers. In light of the events of August 2014 in Ferguson Missouri, the family of the slain 18-year-old ... more

Jan 10, 2018 11:27 AM Cover Story

Christmas Day. This is of note in two small ways that are only of any concern to myself, but I’m the one writing this column so you get the unenviable joy of listening to both of them. The first is that Christmas Day falls precisely three days ... more

Dec 27, 2017 11:32 AM On The Beat

The residentially challenged. That’s what I believe they are referred to as now, but it’s been a few weeks since I’ve had a conversation with an overly-sensitive idiot with the lack of sense to keep their mouth shut around me regarding what is ... more

Dec 6, 2017 11:33 AM On The Beat

Naturally like all cops I'm part man, part eagle, part wildebeest, part bloodhound, part cheetah, and part bear. But mostly I'm just really good at finding obvious stuff, which was the case this evening when I found a trail of money leading into ... more

Nov 15, 2017 11:55 AM On The Beat

The sun was directly overhead and casting shadows of barren tree branches across the path of the sidewalk I was walking on beside a local mall, and I could swear for just a second that I saw a vapor trail of my own breath upon exhaling. more

Oct 25, 2017 1:19 PM On The Beat

“Are you Batman?” a child asked me while sitting for a moment in Coolidge Park. “No,” I said with a good natured smile. “I’m not Batman. Why do you ask?” “Because Batman wears black, and has a utility belt, and doesn’t have superpowers. I think ... more

Oct 4, 2017 1:49 PM On The Beat

He came into the sally port of the jail with an air of confusion, something well-earned since he hadn’t been inside there in longer than anyone—including himself—could remember. “Big Al” had been a cop longer than most people in the intake room ... more

Sep 13, 2017 12:24 PM On The Beat

It’s over. The August 12th rally in Charlottesville in which one group of a-holes planned to have a rally to “unite the right” was met head on by a diametrically opposed different set of a-holes who felt the need to tell them that they were ... more

Aug 23, 2017 11:32 AM On The Beat

“When you guys put somebody in the car and you’re protecting their head you know, the way you put their hand over [their head],” Trump said, mimicking the motion. “Like, ‘Don’t hit their head and they’ve just killed somebody, don’t hit their ... more

Aug 2, 2017 10:11 AM On The Beat

I’m not talking about that of mankind (or even that really horrible David Duchovny movie from 2001); I’m talking about the evolution of the American Civil Liberties Union and Police Body Worn Cameras. In police-involved shooting after shooting ... more

Jul 12, 2017 11:03 AM On The Beat

He closed his eyes, pulled deeply on a smoke and held it to his lips long after his lungs could expand no more, His body froze for a few precious seconds before releasing as if it was his last act and to be cherished forever, the bitter heat of ... more

Jun 21, 2017 11:10 AM On The Beat

For as long as I can remember, self-appointed watchdog groups, “activists”, and the ACLU have demanded the implementation and use of body worn cameras (or BWC’s) for police officers. Every hour they are on the clock should be recorded and made ... more

May 31, 2017 10:39 AM On The Beat

“Tiny Sammiches.” That’s what you’d have us believe when you get caught for something stupid and try to explain away the dozens of tiny Ziploc baggies you have on hand? You’re going to use your one lie (since two or more is just outright rude and ... more

May 10, 2017 12:04 PM On The Beat

I was still trying to slow my pulse down and control my anger when I heard the cell phone ringing in the living room. Whoever it was, was not important. It could wait. I took advantage of the dim light in the room and closed my eyes to facilitate ... more

Apr 19, 2017 1:29 PM On The Beat

It’s late March. Valentine’s Day has come and gone, but let’s face it, we’re all still thinking the same thing here: what about the hookers? (I mean, am I right?) Valentine’s Day was on a Tuesday this year which is great for guys with girlfriends ... more

Mar 29, 2017 4:25 PM On The Beat

I was vulnerable. I admit this. I had seen a wonderful movie the night before that had completely put me off my game, or at least allowed me to adjust my mental armor in such a way that I was willing to give life—and  apparently my customers—a ... more

Mar 8, 2017 11:46 AM On The Beat

I was at the “Meet Your Muslim Neighbor” event on a gorgeous Saturday afternoon, and just as I expected, it was a hit. As far as special assignments go, this was far from the worst. I mean it was 60 degrees, sunny, the venue was one way in and ... more

Feb 15, 2017 12:58 PM On The Beat

I came back into the fire hall with absolutely no sensation in my cheeks despite the weird scarf-contraption-thing dear ol’ Momma Teach had bought me years ago pulled up over my nose, and the leather (pleather?) gloves with separate glove ... more

Jan 26, 2017 10:17 AM On The Beat

Despite the desperate need to create an adversarial relationship with police officers in the local tristate area to justify pretty much anything local activists can think of, there simply hasn’t been anything to work with regarding this topic ... more

Jan 4, 2017 11:14 AM On The Beat

Digital Issue 15.03


January 22, 2018


January 23, 2018


January 24, 2018


January 25, 2018


January 26, 2018


January 27, 2018


January 28, 2018