T’was a few days before Christmas, yet not quite in the mood.
Only looking forward to all the holiday food.
Cooking Christmas Eve dinner is something I adore.
Then I heard it, although lightly, there was a knock on my door.
So, I looked out my window, and who did I see,
Santa was there, just waiting on me.
Santa, you’re skinny now, WOW, who knew?
“Ho, ho,” he replied, “but for Christmas this won’t do.”
“My suit won’t fit right, so I came looking for you.”
“Me?” I asked. “You must be mistaken.”
“Yes you,” he replied. “Now make me some bacon.”
“Just for the holidays,” he said. “I need to be jolly and round.”
“They say you’re a foodie, so help me put on the pounds.”
He walked in and made his way to my table,
“Conjure up some goodies,” he said. “Every meal you are able.”
I set out his cookies and started hoisting out pans,
I started chopping up veggies and opening cans.
I cut up some cheese and prepared him a platter,
Then I turned my attention to the heart of the matter.
His visit would be short, after all, he can only stay for a while,
“OK Santa,” I said. I’ll feed you Cuban-style.”
I made him white rice, black beans and Cuban steak.
He ate roast pork and plantains until, so full, that he ached.
And just when I thought he had to be through,
He burped and smiled and said, “One meal more will do.”
I couldn’t believe it. Someone who eats much more than me.
Yet there he still sat, eating sliced bread with Brie.
“Dude you’re the king,” I said. “You beat me by a mile.”
“Well I’m a foodie too,” he said with a smile.
“I don’t do this year-round, but need to fit in my suit.”
“Now go fetch me my final meal, go on now, scoot.”
Back in the kitchen I cooked until my cupboard was bare.
Not a piece of pie left, nor any yuca to spare.
Santa stood up, stretched and was looking quite pleased.
“I’m so full and round,” he laughed. “I can’t see my knees.”
“Look how my suit fits,” he added. “It’s perfect and snug.”
“Thank you my dear,” he said and gave me a hug.
He rubbed his belly, loosened his belt and walked back toward the door.
So joyous was he that he danced ‘cross the floor.
“Now I’m ready for work,” he said. “There is so much to do.
“I must pack up the sleigh and get the elves ready, too.
Mrs. Claus will be shocked to see me, not know what to think,
But she’ll understand why,” he nodded and winked.
“There’s lots of gifts to give during my holiday spree.
And you must clean up that kitchen and decorate your tree.”
I stood there amazed as he pranced around my floor,
He did another small dance as he walked out my door.
He jumped in his sleigh and fixed the seat up just right.
He rubbed his belly once more and chuckled with delight.
“You filled my belly and warmed my heart,” he said, eyes twinkling bright.
“I’ll see you again soon,” and off he went out of sight.
“Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight.”
OK, yeah, this is my own foodie version of “T’was the Night before Christmas.” It is intended for fun and laughter only; however, let it be known that no one goes hungry at my house — ever!
In all seriousness whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza or any of the other holiday traditions, religious or otherwise, enjoy it and be safe.
Take the opportunity to celebrate those in your life who bring you joy, happiness and, yes, even laughter.