On The Beat


A Short Essay On The Physics of Drunkeness

It was exactly where dispatch said it would be so it was easy to find…but it’s always easy to spot a car when it’s upside down.

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The Camaraderie of The Thin Blue Line

I was in a hot tub in a Hyatt hotel just outside of Nashville when a complete stranger across from me asked if “the deal about the thin blue line, about the camaraderie, was as real as TV and movies makes it out to be?” more »

Dec 10, 2014 5:14 PM On The Beat

Kaynine On Kall

He sat in the center of the back seat, his front legs locked, yet still nimble enough to deal with the G-forces as I occasionally slowed or turned more quickly than inertia allows a 60-pound quadruped sitting on cushioned vinyl... more »

Dec 4, 2014 10:39 AM On The Beat

Have a Happy Copsgiving

Picture it: The cloying scent of multiple dishes of food combining to permeate every pore of your body (as well as your clothing—you will smell delicious the next time you wear that fall sweater). more »

Nov 26, 2014 4:45 PM On The Beat

Fight Or...Well...Fight

“NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER!” my partner cried as he took our customer to the ground in a surprisingly graceful rotating arm-bar takedown. more »

Nov 20, 2014 9:54 AM On The Beat

Welcome to the Fast Lane

“It’s such bullshit,” said Young Chattanoogan #1. He was referring to a speed-reduction initiative taking place on Highway 153 a week ago. And by “speed-reduction initiative,” I mean a carpet-bombing of cops ... more »

Nov 13, 2014 12:00 AM On The Beat

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